Friday, July 16, 2010


Last week Caroline and I returned to Casa Hogar Douglas for a few days to care for our boys once again. Thursday morning as we were just starting our day, one of the other workers came to inform us that today was Jose’s graduation. In Mexico graduating from Kinder is a big deal. So we got Jose dressed in his graduation outfit which consisted of white dress pants, dress shoes, a white dress shirt and the icing on the cake was a navy blue silk cumber bun and bow tie. Then it was time for graduation, and I got to go as Jose’s parent representative! It was totally the Lord’s timing because just enough kids had gone home to calm things down enough to allow Caroline to stay alone and not go crazy. Because we had very little warning I had to go in a t-shirt and basketball shorts, needless to say I was a little underdressed, but no one really seemed to care. As he sat there on my lap and as we took pictures together I wondered what all the other parents thought. Who did they think I was? I’m certainly not his mom, do they all know he’s the orphan and that I’m just someone who takes care of him? Do they think less of him because of that? Do they pity him? These are the questions that ran through my mind throughout the 2 hour ceremony. But still I was so so excited to get to be there for him even as my heart broke as I watched all the other kids with their moms, dads, and grandparents. He deserves to have all of those people in his life giving him love and attention and as much as I want to, I can't be that. All I can do is love him with a love that comes not from myself but from the Lord and rest in the truth that God is big enough to heal the rest. I am honored that the Lord is choosing to use me to express his love for these children in so many ways, even at a kindergarten graduation :)

1 comment:

  1. awww sammy that sounds so rewarding!! I'm glad to hear Jose could have you there! I bet it just meant the world to him :)